TL

Rachel,
I’m so sorry to hear this. I wrote my comment in response to pinklight and didn’t read yours. This is terribly difficult to grow up with. I know since I experienced similar.

However, what I’m going to say now may feel strange. Our best hope of healing will be found in forgiving such people. They are spiritually sick. We don’t need to share their sickness. Forgiveness is letting go of expecting to be righted. God will make it right. They aren’t going to change unless God does something. And God isn’t going to do anything in them if they resist His admonitions. Once we let their influence in our lives (on this subject) go, we can then stand back and be who we really are. And we can extend both pity and mercy toward them, for they are blind to their sin. We can also resist future bad influence from them. Once we forgive them, our ability to say NO with graciousness, firmness and understanding will be increased.

And then we can honor such a parent as a parent without receiving the damage from their sins.