Cheryl

Exegetist,

What you said was the truth and not a lie. In over two years of history on this blog only once did a name come up (“christdependent”) from CARM’s discussion board and it was only regarding why there was a double standard and while egalitarians were being disciplined on the CARM, yet there was abusive language being allowed to happen against egalitarians by one of CARM’s posters and Diane was responsible for doing nothing about it even though it had been reported many times.

When one creates a set of rules and then allows some to bypass the rules while others are treated with the letter of the law, the question will come up why the double standard. Why allow the name calling and mocking when it is by one of their own complementarians? This is not an “attack” on a person posting on CARM but a valid example of an two tier system that treats people differently depending on their view of women in ministry. If Diane had disciplined “christdependent” for her name calling and mockery, she would never have been mentioned on my blog. No one here called “christdependent” evil or wicked or a witch or going to hell. Can this also be said about some of the posters at CARM? Diane herself has done much name calling and allowing these abusive words to be said about egalitarians merely because of a difference in belief in a secondary doctrinal issue is a shame from those who call themselves followers of Christ!

When the leader in charge watches a person throwing stones at another person and then that leader complains that the stone thrower is “attacked” because the one who has been hit by the stone complains about the abuse (when nothing has been done by the leader to stop the abuse), this is the same tactic practiced by high control abusive groups. Someone not involved in such a group can identify the tactic for what it is. It is blaming the victim for the abuse and using the fact that one “dares” to speak out against the abuse as a reason for hurling more abuse.

What happens with hierarchists is that they need to grab onto anything, and I mean ANYTHING to support their harsh treatment of women. Matt says that I attacked him first on the radio so this justifies his attack on me. I have asked people who know neither Matt nor myself to listen to the audio files and tell me where the “attack” is. People have told me there are amazed and ashamed at how Matt treated me. Do they recognize an “attack” against Matt from me? No one has seen it or pointed it out to me. The fact is that Matt holds women back from teaching the bible with authority and he isn’t going to allow me to be looked on with favor no matter how kind I come across. I must be made to look like an enemy of the church so that he can create a reason to call me names, speak of me in a disrespectful tone and mock me. Then if anyone comes to my defense, they are seen as “attacking” Matt. So in Matt’s eyes the only way that I would not be “attacking” him is for me to say that I am wrong in believing that a woman is allowed by scripture to teach the bible with authority to men. Anything else is “attacking” him.

Also the only way for someone who regularly enjoys reading my posts to not be attacking Matt is to say that Matt is a man’s man who should be allowed to jump on women for teaching the bible with authority to men. If they disagree with Matt’s treatment of me, they should suck it up and not speak up regarding this injustice because Matt is just too sensitive to take any criticism for his behavior. What is wrong with this picture? Matt loves to be called a heretic by Oneness Pentecostals and he doesn’t feel “attacked” at all, but let someone say he is wrong to call me a heretic and the world has suddenly fallen in. This is certainly a double standard and it is not wrong to point this out. The bible is filled with instances of injustice being pointed out. When an unrighteous act is identified the result should be repentance, not an escalation of the same “attack”.

The fact is that strict hierarchalists must make enemies of egalitarians. Those who take hierarchy to the extent that CARM does can not say good things about egalitarians no matter what. While I found good things to say about Matt’s ministry and I commended him for his ministry on the first radio program, he has yet to say that my ministry is valid or worthwhile or that I am teaching good things to Jehovah’s Witnesses and helping them find faith in Christ. Why is that? It is because anyone who doesn’t agree with him on this secondary issue is an all-out enemy. It appears that it is almost impossible for him to find something good to say about me even though we agree on all of the essentials of the Christian faith.

I have been told that I was extremely nice to Matt on his radio program even when I was constantly cut off and derided. Yet Matt makes fun of my gentle manner that does not attack back. What Matt would like me to do is to say anything that he could rework and create into an “attack” that would justify his own bad behavior. If I tell people that I don’t want hateful speech on this blog, then I am wrong for saying I will edit out bad words. If I don’t edit people when they share their disappointment and dismay at bad behavior, I am told that I am an evil person.

All of this is the fruit of hierarchy. There is great fear in their losing control.