CinnamonRoll

@Lin who said, “There were quite a few that did not fit into the stereotypical ‘male’ role. They were artistic, musical, etc. but were expected to be interested in sports, hunting and more masculine pursuits. This made them think there was already something wrong with them because they were drawn to design, art or theatre.”

I was a tom boy when I was a girl. I preferred climbing trees and wearing jeans. But every Sunday my mom would dress me up in itchy, frilly pink dresses so I’d be acceptable to the adults at church.

I don’t have kids and don’t like them (nor do I like babies). I feel uncomfortable around babies/kids, but every women I meet, including church women, always assume I have kids, or that I like them and want to spend time around them. Every time I walk into a new church, the greeters assume I’m divorced with kids (wrong, never been married, never had a kid).

I think there are still some expectations in many churches that boys act and dress one way, and girls dress and act another. It can be very uncomfortable for you when you don’t fit everyone’s ideas of what a female is “supposed” to be.

This creates other problems for females, too, these narrow, cultural ideals – we’re conditioned by society and the church to be codependent.

Raising females with the belief they have to always be submissive, sweet, forever compliant doormats who never express anger or are never to express what they really think and feel (and also teaching Christians that these beliefs are BIBLICAL behavior and that God expects it of females) – attracts abusive or controlling men. This is one reason why so many sweet, naive Christian girls wind up marrying emotionally or physically abusive jerks.

Once a Christian woman gets hitched to an abusive man, some men in the church (who say divorce is never, ever right or permissble) do yet more damage and tell her to stay in the cruddy marriage.

Teaching females to stick with rigid gender roles and to be codependent (and that it’s also biblical – even though it’s not-) also has other negative outcomes, such as hindering a woman’s performance on the job and other areas of life.