TL

“(Note: Col 3:18 has an imperative “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.” but if we select from the range of meanings for hupotasso-’connection’ and for anako/”fit”-”connect”, the verse would be rendered “Wives be connected to your husbands as you are connected in the Lord”)”

I like your conclusion, Charis. And if fits quite well with my understanding. But I disagree that it isn’t voluntary. That is the whole point IMO, that it is all voluntary; both to be arranging ourselves under one another, or be connected, and in wives doing so with their husbands in their whole life. Wives should not withhold parts of themselves, unless the husband is abusive and harmful.