175 Tiffany,

I really praise God that you are still here and not taking offense. This is the place where the body ministers to one another and the passionate arguments are a ministry that may plant seeds in all of our hearts. I know that I have already been touched by thoughts that I had not articulated myself.

You said:

The Bible says “wives submit to your husbands as unto the Lord.” How is it that we are to submit to God?

Submitting to the Lord is clear – we are to submit “in the sincerity of heart”. In the same way we are to submit to our husbands in sincerity of heart. But the Bible doesn’t say that we are to submit as to Deity because that would be idolatry. In fact many women are guilty of idolatry by putting their husbands before the Lord.

How is the church to respond to Christ?

“with sincerity of heart”.

No, the verses do not tell the husband to take authority. But that isn’t what I (and others) have been saying.

It seems to me that NN has been telling us that the husband is to take authority over his wife if there is a dispute. But the question I would have for you, if a husband doesn’t take authority, then what good is his having authority? Most staunch complementarians will agree that the authority that belongs to the husband is a trump card that is to be pulled out whenever the wife’s will is different than the husband’s will. It (the authority) decides whose will, will be followed. If it (the authority) isn’t brought out then the marriage is following the egalitarian model for unused authority is no different in reality than no ultimate authority.

I believe I am to submit to my husband *as unto the Lord*, which is a distinction made to the husband/wife relationship that isn’t made for the others.

That actually isn’t true since Ephesians 6:5 also tells slaves, men and women to obey as to Christ.

Ephesians 6:5 (NASB)
5 Slaves, be obedient to those who are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in the sincerity of your heart, as to Christ;

This follows the injunction to submit one to another “in the fear of the Lord” and I would think that fearing God would be a good reason for masters to submit to their slaves since in the natural they would not have a willingness to do so except for the fear of the Lord.

I don’t fully understand how marriage is an image of Christ and His bride, but it is, and it is my desire to convey truth of that relationship through my own and to see others do the same.

The image is one of oneness. The Lord treats His body as He does Himself so that He puts all things under His authority by putting them under His feet. That is putting all authority under our feet. He shares His authority with us so that we will be judging the angels in the next life. All judgment has been given to Jesus but He shares that authority for judgment with His bride. Sharing of all things brings a complete unity and a oneness in love.

Are there times when husbands do a horrible job conveying the truth of a Christ in their marriages? Absolutely. I rather think it is caused by the sin of pride and self reliance.

That may be of some but it sure wasn’t of my husband. He tried his very best to do what God required of him. It wasn’t pride in his case but his love for me and his desire to be what he thought the head was required to be. He believed that God required him to make the decisions for me when we disagreed. It really was his own self-less desires to be a real good husband that brought us into trouble. It wasn’t his own pride that was a problem – it was the system that was flawed.