gengwall

Cheryl – I agree with you. Mark’s example does not at all show authority of the “head” over the “body”, but instead looks far more like egal mutual submission. I also agree with your parallel example where I suspect Mark would give equal deference to his wife to make a decision. Moreover, while being just a simple example which I appreciate, it can hardly be proven scripturally that the decision to let children leave the table (or any other such decision in the household) is the males unilateral role or that the male is somehow unilaterally gifted (and the female unqualifies) to make such a decision. Which means it boils down, as usual, to individual couples “doing family” in their own way.

In my house, the situation was actually reversed. My wife, coming from a stricter family, was more prone to expect the children to stay at the table until everyone was done eating. The kids, knowing I would be inclined to allow an early departure, would ask me first if they could leave. Out of respect for my wife’s views on the subject, I would defer to her to give the final release. Certainly, Mark would not claim that my wife was usurping my authority by “leading” in this family situation, nor would he claim I was shirking my responsibility. Or would he? I think such a position would be absurd, so I expect he agrees that the way we did the dinner thing was just as legitimate as the way he did. Which proves our point – it is not an exercise in authority.

Mark – what we need from you is something that you believe is universally and unilaterally within the husband’s sphere of authority. Something that only husbands are qualified and commanded by scripture to do within the marriage. Something that would consitute sin if either the husband deferred to the wife or the wife took the lead. Is there anything in your marriage or in comp theology that husbands must always do and wives are never allowed to do. And please, when you answer, give us the scriptural playbook to back up the theology. Your saying so doesn’t make it so – we must see where scripture says it’s so.