Lynn

Here’s a public archive from the CCC forum. It’s available to anybody who has internet access. The post number is #27337. DL is Donna, and Kamilla is Kamilla. I am going to have to eliminate hatch marks in the original in order for the comment to go through. Donna and others constantly mentioned “Borg Queen” on that forum.

DL:
I think that you are correct. However, they [ie women who have been abused who gravitate to CBE] tend to dwell on the abuse. They tend to want to keep the hurt and the memory going. That is not Christian.

Kamilla:
Yes, they cherish it and feed it, lovingly watch it grow until it
comsumes them. They’d rather remain victims, crying “Woe is me, I
have been abused!” on the street corner like the proud pharisee
praying out loud how glad he’s not, yadda yadda yadda.

DL:
Wow! Yes, I fear that you are correct. I am thinking Gollum. He was a disgusting, yet pathetic creature, who had been warped by the ring of power. Is there an analogy, here? It is a fearful thing, since any of us can be corrupted by the desire for power – or empowerment? That “will to power” becomes more precious than
anything else, and we will sacrifice anything and everything, anyone
and everyone to that desire? Maybe?

[Lynn here — Donna, that comparison of abused women who become egalitarian to Gollum is worse than pathetic. That’s the first time I’d seen that.]

Kamilla:
Stepping out of that and into forgiveness is scary. Better the devil you know. . .

DL:
Yes, the land of perpetual forgiveness can be a scary place.
Goodness! I just can’t keep from comparing what you are saying to
Gollum.

DL:
…abuse, then work at forgiving the abuser – even if you don’t have continuing contact with them – , and letting the memories go.

Kamilla:
I think this is one of the key problems – people misunderstand
forgiveness. Forgiveness doesn’t mean restoration nor does it mean
the offender is released from the consequences of his actions.

DL:
I agree, and would add that forgiveness opens the door for restoration, but it is not the restoration itself. Often, a
relationship will not be restored. However, you don’t have to wait
until someone wants restoration in order to begin forgiving.

Kamilla:
Nor does it even necessarily mean you ever communicate your
forgiveness to the abuser.
. . .
Kamilla:
On the contrary, it is between you and God. Forgiveness releases the forgiver, cleanses them and renews them, removes the poison of hate and desire for revenge from their hearts.

DL:
Yes! That goes against the flesh, doesn’t it?

DL:
Actually, that is part of the Borg Queen’s definition of abuse – if
someone makes me feel bad, then I am being abused.

[Now this is interesting, because Donna claims I and others have abused her. Is she then in agreement with Pat?]
. . .

Kamilla:
I always felt like I was “out of phase” when in conversation with the BQ, does that mean she was abusing me? Hmmmm.

DL:

Well, maybe I need to quit calling her the Borg Queen? 😉 Maybe
I’ve got some work to do on my own beams!

…later…after I say this one more thing… . . .