gengwall

truthseeker – I think head is a position of responsibility, not right or authority. I think headship is exemplified just as Paul says – by loving your wife just as Christ loved the church. This is what I see when I read the essential “head” passage as it relates specifically to marriage – Ephesians 5. When I look at Jesus’ example when acting as the bridegroom for the church, i.e. as “head” of His “wife” and family, I see Him engaging in three primary activites:

1. Intercessory prayer
2. Self Sacrifice (even unto death)
3. Service

I also think that men are designed to be guardians and that is why Adam was given that responsibility. I think the activities above are guardian activities. I think godly men should try to succeed where Adam failed, just as our example, Jesus, has succeeded as the second Adam in all areas that the first Adam failed. We can’t be perfect like Jesus, but we absolutely should try to emulate Him.

NOW – before everyone freeks out, I will highlight the usual objection to such a model and show you why that objection is unnecessary.

What I usually hear when I lay this out is: “oh, so you mean the woman can’t interceed, she can’t sacrifice, she can’t serve, she can’t provide, she can’t protect, she can’t guard, etc., etc.” What people often don’t understand because of the patriarchal influences we have all grown up with is that I am not defining “roles”. It is not the man’s exclusive job to interceed, etc., but it is his responsibility. What does that mean; and why would Paul outline it only for the men? Because we men, in our fallen state, are simply not good at it. It doesn’t mean that women don’t also have these responsibilities, but they don’t need the reminder (and boot to the head, no pun intended, that men do) because they don’t have the same fallen tendancies that we do.

In short – Christ-like headship is the exact opposite of the kind of “rule” that Genesis 3 shows we will be inclined toward.

People often try to look for cultural models to help them visualize such concepts and I believe I have a fairly close one. I have tried to find such a model since the usual ones proposed, like pilot/co-pilot, still reflect an authoritarian hierarchy. The closest model I can think of for “head” in the biblical sense is the captain of a team. The team captain has no authority over the other team members. That is reserved for the Coach (Jesus/God). His position is only one of responsibility and service to the team. He does not have unilateral decision making authority, nor does he uniquely and individually do any team job. In fact, in reality, the captain is often not even the most skilled player on the team. But he does have a “guardian” responsibility and is expected to interceed, sacrifice, and serve on behalf of the others.

So – what think you of that model?

Incidentally, I believe the “submit” and ‘respect” directives for wives follow a parallel purpose and reasoning from Paul. But I have written too much already and I don’t want to derail this thread any more.